Lying about books

I read recently that as many as 65 per cent of people lie about the books they have (not) read; presumably, these are the ones who admit to it, and the real figure is probably much higher. This came as no surprise. I've no doubt that blogs like mine are breeding grounds for this sort of dishonesty. My list is of books I've read in 2009 is real: I mean, who would lie about having read The Biggest Boat I could Afford?! The funny thing about these lists is that you can click on one of your favourites and see the blog profile of others who like it. This gives you an idea of the sort of literary company you find yourself in when you pick up a book. The great majority of my list are the favourites of no one else at all. Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (a brilliant book until the grinding sophistry of the 'search for quality' kicks in) is loved by 50 other Google blog users. One of them lists her hobbies as 'art, photography, writing, reading, running, daydreaming, music, spirituality, sexuality, health & wellness, eastern philosophy, culture, relativity, sociology, anthropology, psychology, pop culture, history, feminism.' Another lists, as a hobby, 'creating'. Robert M Pirsig does warn that few people understand his book (it was initially considered too difficult to print and had to be leavened for publication) - and perhaps he was right. 

Fresh Air Fiend (Paul Theroux) lists three other champions, one of whom lists her hobbies as 'Reading, Shopping, Sleeping and Picking Fights'. I like this. This is not the list of a liar. Paul Theroux, for those who have not discovered him, is a must-read travel writer. Put him above Bill Bryson on your to-read list (and then read Bill Bryson too). The God Delusion scores a massive 880. Now, we're definitely into strange territory here. The book starts well enough, then becomes stultifyingly boring and repetitive as it continues. I stuck with it for about two thirds, by which time I got the message. And now I know why most people don't believe in God: the Bible, like God Delusion, is too boring to read. And I like Richard Dawkins! I'm pretty sure that at least 65 per cent of the 880 have not read this book, and even fewer would genuinely rate it as a favourite. The God Delusion is. The next book on my list that isn't either a cheesy blockbuster or a sea story, is Walden, by HD Thoreau. This account of opting out of modern life to be a hermit in the woods is a real breath of the high thin air of intellectual enquiry, and deservedly seen as one of the greatest books ever written. Supposedly, it changed the direction of Ghandi, among others. It's written in a style that I can only call 'New England puritanical' which can stick in the throat, and it's a struggle at times, and I know has put many people off. Stick with it. It's worth the ride, and it's mercifully short. Amazingly, it's only loved by 10 other Blogspot users. Ben Elton's High Society gets 31, including one young woman who likes to talk with the moon, scream at the sea, do 'nude-bets' and play pool, as well as at least three Australian guys who like boozing and rugby. That makes me feel pretty rotten! I was clearly wrong to enjoy High Society so much. Sorry. Finally, Thames, Sacred River, by Peter Ackroyd, got not a single vote. I'm not surprised. It's pretty dry stuff and I only read it because I thought I had to. But if I was going to lie about things, I would lie about having read this. And I'd also lie about having read To the Lighthouse, by Virginia Woolf, as I'm pretty sure it's so dire, that actually, no one has read it. And I'd definitely lie about having read War and Peace, as I know I'd be in the company of other liars, and we wouldn't ask awkward questions of one another: we'd all be lying together!